11/ 09/ 2026                         I We say, “This is my house, my land, my possessions, my body.” We draw boundaries, sign deeds, build walls and fences to border off what we call ours. But nature doesn’t recognise our land deeds.

I thought I owned the world today. I know it’s another one of those crazy contemplations. As I stood in the huge concrete car park of the wholesalers, a thought came to me that if I am a particle of GOD and, for me, GOD owns the entire universe, then I also own the entire universe, and just like GOD does, I too would like to turn everything back to nature.

As I noticed weeds growing up through the small cracks in the concrete, I knew that GOD already has his automatic recycle plan in place.

Have you ever noticed how fast nature starts to claim back its terrain the moment anything is abandoned by humans? We think we own parts of the earth, but we just borrow them; ultimately all turns back to nature. A storm, a flood, a fire, or just a few grains of sand imported by the wind can let a tree grow through a small crack or seam in a concrete jungle, in time returning it to a real jungle.

There is this very rich man in a village near me who buys up any land that becomes available. Even though it is done out of greed—not for greed of ownership, but because he doesn’t want anyone to buy land and then build a house near him—at the same time, he is saving it from exploitation. He lets any farmer who wishes to use this land for free to grow crops, as long as it remains green.

I wonder if GOD planted a seed in this person’s mind using his greed to  conserve nature.

I think that I might like to do the same thing if I was able to do so financially, just buy up all the land and leave it to nature, it wouldn’t really be mine anyway, but I could protect it for as long as I’m here. Wouldn’t it be for all humanity’s benefit to conserve this land, which filters our air with its plants and trees.

Don’t I do just the same with my body? I claim ownership and take care of it, but in the end it will return back to nature, I’m only borrowing it for a while.

        27/ 07/ 2026                         I was watching a film about President Abraham Lincoln yesterday and the war to abolish slavery in the United States. it got me thinking about our own slavery, aren't we just all slaves to our own desires.                                                                               The more we want, the more money we need, and the more we have to work to satisfy those desires. It becomes an endless cycle in which many of us find ourselves trapped.                                        

      Is it never enough? Even though I still have desires, I now weigh them against the effort required to fulfil them before deciding whether they are truly worth pursuing.                                        

  The mind is terrible that way. We have become slaves to our minds through our desires. No sooner has one desire been fulfilled than the mind quietly presents another. Try to become more aware of this, it's just another way the mind moves.

                    24/ 07/ 2026   I recently received  a copy of my  back from one of my proofreaders. Although he loved my book , he admitted that he was a little dissapointed with my explanation about God. He found it to be too brief and consice.This was intentional, because it was not the core that the book was about. I wanted my first book to remain short and accessible so that anyone could comfortably read it from beginning to end. My hope is to explore these subjects in much greater depth for those who wish to delve further in later writings. The first book was simply to awaken curiosity and spark interest.

In Awake but Still Confused' I wrote "There is no God but God". In this reflection, I would like to explain how I arrived at that conclusion. 

I started to think about creation. If God created everything, then out of what material did he create it? Was this material already present? If it was, then there would have been both God and matter, Which came first? If matter was first then who created God out of that matter? If God came first where did he get the matter with which to create? It became an endless cycle in my mind, rather like the question of what came first -the chicken or the egg.

 I contemplated this question long and deeply, and it came to me that the only answer that made sense was that God used the material that IS himself to create the universe and all that is in it.

I imagine it rather like a ball of clay. God pulls pieces off of himself to create. We are the atoms that make up what God is.

 That is why we can say that we are the children of God. When we turn inward and reconnect with our true selves, we reconnect with God, we are made of the very essence from which everything was created. We are tiny particles of God, and in that sense, everything that exists is God.  

                    27/ 07/ 2026   

I like to play tricks on my own mind. I have found that it helps me to break repetetive habits. It's like a game that I play.

The first thing you need to do is to become aware of one of your habits, one of mine was going downstairs in my pyjamas to drink my morning coffee. You might ask, " what is wrong with that?" I love my quiet morning coffee contemplations, but I began to notice that my body was becoming too comfortable and a little lazy.

 As I contemplated this I realised that my mind had associated pyjamas with rest. It was an association that had quietly been programmed into me since childhood.

I noticed that my husband seemed full of energy from the moment he got out of bed. He dresses himself immediately when he wakes up.

So I decided to try the same approach. For me it definitely works, the moment i get dressed its as though a signal goes to my brain .

                    "Rest is over. It's time for action."

I still have my quiet morning coffee, but it doesnt flow over into almost lunch time.

Sometimes we don't need to change our habits first; we only need to understand and change the associations that created them.